10 Feb 2010

Tyler's Birth Day

“Just get it out?” I am sure I was screaming around this time last year.

The labour was awful. Are any anything but awful, I don’t think so. I was induced. However, twelve hours later and throwing up from too much gas and air, baby number two was still no further forward in coming out.

Eventually got the epidural I had previously asked or shouted for topped up four times before working. I was numb from the neck down, not easy when vomiting.

Who said second babies were easier, not mine, this was stubborn, typical man. After two hours of pushing, with no budging, they decided to give me an emergency caesarean section. I was aware of caesarean sections. I had heard people talk about them and read about them, but never considered having one. Although at times I thought, it sounded easier. Oh, how wrong could I be?

I was rushed into theatre and moved onto a big white operating table. Looking around, feeling scared and helpless. Physically numb, I could feel the doctors and nurses move me around and talk as if I wasn’t there.

My husband came through the big white doors. It really was like something out of a television show. I felt like it was all a dream, but it wasn’t. My life was in danger as they struggled to keep my blood pressure down and oxygen levels up. My baby’s life was in danger as he was stuck and in distress.

My husband sat next to me, feeling faint, all a bit overwhelming for him. As if, but to be fair it must be hard for the dads having to stand by and watch, mop the odd brow. He sat with his head between his knees. I was concerned, but annoyed also, I was scared and needed him.

He came around and was there holding my hand. I looked down, but all I saw was a green partition. The doctor looked up and said, “Ready?” I nodded, would I ever be ready.

I felt some tugging, heard a squelch and what sounded like air rushing out. The doctor rushed the baby over to the paediatrician.

“It’s a boy,” the doctor said.

Why wasn’t there any sound? Why wasn’t he crying I thought to myself? My husband and she shared the same fear; I could see it in his eyes.

After what felt like an eternity, we heard that wonderful sound. Our beautiful baby boy started to cry. He was fine. He was safe. He was here.

Tyler was born at five thirty-two in the morning on the twenty-first January two thousand and nine.

Happy 1st Birthday Tyler. Hope your day is filled with all the love and joy you bring to me.

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